Tuesday, 30 September 2014

New project coming up!

We're planning starting our own business. I didn't expect this coming as it's totally something else what I am studying, but so life goes I guess.

Here are some of my artworks. They will be released as cloth, prints and beddings :) Also some dresses coming later on!

I'm super excited about this project!

Tuesday, 23 September 2014

I need your help!

I came and go with the idea of waking up HFUT. Sometimes I success for a month... sometimes for a day.

Still there's so much potential in HFUT, but my brain is in block. I get all the time feedback and I want to thank you my readers for spending your time on writing me an email! Rarely I reply. It's not because I don't care - it's opposite! It's really that those emails make me realize again and again how I created once something that has actually helped people. And actually it's not me - it's you that have red my writings with open mind.

So I have one favor... If anyone of you has any idea how I could develop this page into working site again, where I would have fun to write and share information about Helsinki - tell me your opinion! Let's not talk about my grammar mistakes ;) I would like to make this site something much clear and working, now it seems like a hazard, or do you like it this way? I think this site represents my ex life, which was hazard, now I have lol grown up lol. Lol.




No really I want to start writing here again. I want to upload photos of Helsinki, I want to give you ideas what to do here. I want to share my adventures, show my life here as urban Helsinki citizen.

And you know what, I don't even live in Kallio anymore. I have moved to some other area which is much more cooler!

But now I gotta run to my umm..well he's not my boyfriend but a very good friend ;D

So things have changed, HFUT needs to change too. BUT HOW?

Ahh, finally I could finish writing. See, when I start, it never ends!

New blog about Finland (and else)

I still don't have time as I have to run to school but..

I made this new blog. It includes beautiful and ugly photos from Finnish nature. Also there are some other photos to mix it up a bit.


There are so many nice things happening in Helsinki all the time. It's pity that I've lost the flow for writing. Boh.

Teurastamo - finally we've got something special

I don't have time now to write but if you are in Helsinki, or coming here, one place to check out is Teurastamo.

There's a fantastic restaurant in loft type surrounding. NIICE!



Saturday, 6 September 2014

This morning

I was cycling today morning from my friends place to my mothers. One of my favorite bridges to cross in Helsinki is Kulosaari bridge which is between Kalasatama and Kulosaari metro stops. From the bridge you can see the beginning and the end of the day. And it's always beautiful - or at least the view is eye catching.

Today morning there was thick fog in Helsinki and I had to stop - once again - at the bridge and take a photo. Here it is: Mustikkamaa island.

The view was like painting. Is this real life?

Tuesday, 19 August 2014

End of summer - last opportunity to use the summer cottage-card

My family doesn't own a summer cottage. Gladly I have always had the opportunity to visit my friends families summer cottages in different parts of Finland. The best thing is, that usually people are happy when they get to go there with their friends.

It was last Friday when I was super upset. Life was deep from ass. My heart was broken and I though life won't continue from this. Then I con act my best friend who invites me to join their weekend trip to Alajärvi, in Western Finland where other friend owns a summer cottage.

I didn't think for long. It was time to make this spontaneous move. And there we were - driving towards Alajärvi which is approx. 400 km away from Helsinki.

When we arrived there, I straight away relaxed. In the morning I woke up early to have a look how the place looked like as we arrived during night time. And I loved what I saw. A huge lake was yelling for our names - it was time to go fishing soon. But first slow breakfast. And yeah, then we had to search for worms to get some fish.

Everything these small things, which apparently felt therapeutic. And fishing was a great success too as we got four fishes which we grilled later.

I strated to feel enormously happy.

We walked around the area, finding blueberries, raspberries, lingonberries and chantarells.

I have spent too many hours regretting, but now I realized it. Now I remembered what life can be. What happiness can be. And I have been trying to spend my time with person who has sucked my good energy away. And I have probably sucked his.

All this beauty of nature made me remember who I am. I have lost myself, but now I found the person I was before I met him.

I'm going to keep this feeling alive. The biggest thanks goes to my friend who took me with them. I was just constantly repeating "I'm so happy here!"

And I truly were. And still am :)

 Searching for worms 

See more photos from my Instagram profile :)

Something to think about...

Lovely Jaakko Eino Kalevi featured in Kasper Bjørke's new single!

Friday, 8 August 2014

Finnish nature again

Photographed myself on the way to Lammassaari. It's a very good place for photo shootings.

I could have looked happier but I wasn't happy so even if I felt like smiling, this was what I could give out. Whoops.

Thursday, 7 August 2014

Photos from Finnish nature

All (c) Me

32nd day of tropical heat - in Finland?!

4 am swim at Mattolaituri

It was June of this year and the weather was bad for many days. People were afraid that summer won't come this year. Facebook was filled with complaining about the weather. Some people were even angry about it.

Most of the Finns were just upset.

THEN BA-BAM! Now we're living the 32nd day of tropical heat. The sun is squeezing every single bit of water out from us which we are trying to drink. People are saying to me "Esin, you look so different nowadays", and I answer "It's this tan on my skin, I don't usually have this brown skin".

Now some people are complaining of the heat. And I have to admit that it is slightly too hot. I was moving my stuff to my friends cellar (yes, I'm homeless again) and I thought I'm going to die. Now I understand why they have siesta in Spanish countries.

And apartments? Our apartments in Finland are made for -30°C, not 30°C. So the heat stays inside nicely. Mm...

But let's forget those negative stuff. This heat has bring some people together in a nice way. Like most of the people are hanging in the parks every single day and meeting new people. That's rare during the winter when you don't see that much peeps outside. Also there are some new places where urban Helsinki citizens go: one is Mattolaituri (hmmm... carpet pier?) just next to Merihaka. That's a fantastic place to go for after party after partying in Kuudes Linja or Kaiku which are just near by. There you can jump into the sea or just hang around with other people.

Other spot which I prefer more is Sompasauna - a self served public sauna. Read more about the place from here.

During daytime it's nice to go and discover islands. My favorite ones have been this year Suomenlinna and Mustikkamaa. But there are pleeeenty of islands to discover, like Lammassaari - sheep island where you can spot sheeps too.

Also there are free open air parties almost every weekend in Kalasatama. And what is nicer than a open air party when it's 30°C? Yeap.

So, this heat has been painful for some people, but I have enjoyed it full on. Ok, I've been complaining sometimes but it's in my blood. Complaining is the Finnish way of expressing emotions.

Dallape park in Kallio reminds me of Görlitzer park in Berlin

In Kalasatama's Konttiaukio there has been plenty of open air parties

In Sompasauna there has been also outdoor karaoke. In some moment it got wild and some people were singing even naked. 

In Mustikkamaa you can bake yourself in public beach or find your own private spot

Monday, 6 January 2014

Finnish breakfast

I'm one of those maniacs who thinks gluten is bad for your body. And after I learnt more about glutens negative effects to your body - I decided to leave it off from my daily diet. Sure sometimes I eat a piece of cake - hey can one say no when someone offers a piece of delicious cake?

Still, I think gluten is poison. And every time I eat that piece of cake, the next day I really feel anxious and I have bags under my eyes. Also I think skin in my face looks like I'm an alcoholic. Also I feel fatter than day before :D As I said, I'm one of those maniacs who think gluten is bad for you, so some people may think that this all is just happening inside my head.

But still, when I don't eat gluten I feel better. I have more energy, I'm happy, I don't have bags under my eyes. And I feel slim.

I know in many cultures people eat bread for breakfast. I did it before too. Leaving bread wasn't difficult for me, and actually if I want to eat bread, I choose rice crackers which are usually gluten free and taste like popcorn. And I love popcorn.

This summer I started to eat porridge every morning. When I was child I couldn't stand porridge. I remember when I was at kindergarten. I was sitting alone in the dining room and looking at my porridge plate. I remember that I was almost vomiting. I couldn't eat it. Then they felt mercy and let me go.

But now I learnt to eat porridge and it's one of the reasons I want to get up in the morning - that I will get my yummy porridge! And in Finland maaany many people eat porridge for brekkie. Nowdays sure brunch culture has arrived in Finland, but when people are at home, many of them eat porridge for brekkie. And if you stay in a hotel in Helsinki and you have breakfast included, there will be porridge for sure.

I prepare mine with a bit of milk so it becomes creamy. When it's ready, instead of butter I add linseed oil.

Porridge is fantastic breakfast! Forget croissants and shit. They are not good for your body&soul.

PS. if you are interested on learning more about gluten, read this

BBC lifts up Finnish architecture

It was year 1904 when Finnish architect Eliel Saarinen won the competition with his design for new Helsinki railway station. Before this other famous Finnish architect, Carl Albert Edefelt, had designed railway station to Helsinki, but it was too small.

In year 1919 the building was ready. It's made from Finnish granite. As you might know we have lot's of granite and Finnish nature is very rocky.  

I like it how back in the days they used to organize competitions for who designs something, and still they do, but apparently sometimes politicians hire their friends to do some works. Like Finnish politician Jyrki Ktainen (NCP) hired his friend Pekka Himanen to do 700 000€ research. And citizens of Finland paid it all. He didn't compete potential candidates, he just chose Himanen with his pretty high price.

Well, NCP is not Social Democratic Party, so they have their own way... Unfair I'd say, but after huge media boom, they decided that Katainen didn't do anything wrong when he chose Himanen.

Anyhow, BBC chose Helsinki railway station within ten the most beautiful railway stations in the world. And I have to admit, it is very nice. And usually I don't like this kind of massive buildings, but it has it's own vibe and the color red heats Helsinki during cold and dark winter.

Photo WikiMedia

Source: Wikipedia & Metro

Finland won the World championship!

In ringette! Ringette? Yeah, ringette.

Sunday, 5 January 2014

New short movie from me

"Love - It's end starts from misconnection and continues to the point when you realize you weren't supposed to be together after all. Actually, it was the stone inside you holding you back."

“It's not where you take things from - it's where you take things to.” 
― Jean-Luc Godard

Saturday, 4 January 2014

Empty buildings, empty spaces and expensive rents in Helsinki

You know, when I moved first time in downtown Kallio it was year 2004. I paid for my one room flat 370€. It had 18m2. Sure it was small, but my incomes were extremely low as I was studying. So my student money just covered my rent and I was happy.

And then there's today, when you easy pay 800€ for one room apartments in Kallio. My friend just rented a one room apartment from West Finland, Vaasa and she's paying 330€ for it.

Nowadays that my 18m2 apartment might be over 500€ because of it's location. Just a couple of years ago Punavuori in central Helsinki was the area where all the hipsters wearing red beanies wanted to live. And the apartments were bloody expensive - and probably still are but less people live there anymore. These red beanie hipsters have moved to Kallio and that makes me a bit angry because before they would say Kallio is shit and too far away etc. I have always loved Kallio because of it's atmosphere. But these red hat hipsters.... they have ruined the area.

Ok, let's forget my angst towards them, this post was supposed to subject rents in Helsinki and empty spaces where people are not allowed to move. Now the funny people with power to rule things have decided to set a new funny rule which would go on for next 4,5 years. It's a prohibition (for sure) in which empty building spaces and commercial spaces are not allowed to make homes for people. And there are lot's of these kind of spaces in Helsinki which would make perfect apartment for peeps. Still, single empty spaces which are upper than 3rd floor, could be made livable but this is not a huge % of all of the empty spaces in Helsinki.

For me, there's no way I could move back to Helsinki. I would never ever pay 800€ for one room apartment. My ex apartment from which I moved away when I moved to Berlin, that lovely 30m2 in Kallio, is probably now over 700€, maybe 750€. I paid 640€. And these prices do't include electric etc.

Move to some suburb area? Why? I liked to live in Kallio. No, I loved. Why should one move away from somewhere he/she likes to live? Aah, I see.. because of capitalism and stupid rules.

Yeah, move to Helsinki. So good idea!

Source: Helsingin Uutiset

The man who didn't salute Hitler

Read the whole story here

Friday, 3 January 2014

Finnish band: Villa Nah

I think I haven't written about this fantastic band. Or do I have to write anything, it's music. Listen and understand what I mean.

Ps. They have played Villa Nah even on Skins. Wow. Sorry for all those "wow" all the time. Doge has corrupted my mind.

Sauna I forgot to tell about!

Ok, so I might start a blog called Helsinki Sauna. But as sauna's interest people and as my blog is to help you to discover Helsinki... I gotta share any information that interests you.

Kulttuurisauna aka Culture sauna(?) is this modern sauna built in Hakaniemi by architects Tuomas Toivonen and Nene Tsuboi The main idea is that it's energy friendly, you know after postmodern saunas appeared (yes those which work with electricity) they actually ate shit loads of electricity. Imagine something heats itself from zero to 80°C and it's on for several hours.

In Kulttuurisauna the heating system works its own way. I'm not going to tell you how, it's much more fun when you go there and discover!

(I don't tell you how because it's morning and my English is not the sharpest at the moment)

It's not that cheap to visit this sauna: adults pay 15€, students 12€,..etc. There's also swimming spot just next to the sauna, at the sea.

Hakaniemenranta 17, 00530 Helsinki, Finland

Opening hours?
Wed-Sat 4 - 8 (9) pm

I am sorry, I wish I had photos to share. Now I just have to use ones from the internet and it's no fun as it's kinda of stealing. But I'm going to Finland next month and I'll make a list about places to photograph and try to make this blog more visually interesting.

Photo from here

Lost and found

“The problem for us is not are our desires satisfied or not. The problem is how do we know what we desire.” 
 Slavoj Žižek

When you brake up, it's one of the most inspiring kick. Honestly, I've been in inspirational block for about 6 months. Usually I am very highly inspired and creating things is just something I do to cure my mental health.

And as mental health I just mean that it helps me through frustration, which I become too easy. I'm not crazy and I don't have mental problems - that I also learnt after breaking up.

I learnt some self respect, in a healthy way. I learnt to trust myself, which was before almost impossible. I automatically was thinking that everything I do is shit. I was always looking my creations from negative angle.

Some people have this as physically - they hate how they look, some people hate their real life and try to create a new life by hiding their real personalities... there are several types of hiding yourself. It is true that the worse enemy in your life is YOU. When you don't feel ok inside, how can you see beauty of life?

I'm the one in our family who always smiled and didn't cause problems. I am very kind person and people have also been telling me this and they have been worried that I will get hurt one day because I am the way I am. Still, I want to stay kind, I believe on helping others, but... then there are people who use you. And this was totally new for me. Or I have been friends with this kind of people, but they have never used me as I have been always honest. They couldn't do it.

I guess.

But then the day came, when I was used. My kindness and sensitivity was used and it felt horrible. There was emotions included, which made everything looots more difficult. It sucked my dry. I lost weight several kilos (again) just in few months. I lost my inspiration to create and interest on everything. And as I liked him and as I had built this caring connection to him, I couldn't let him go. And this was when I went deeper.  He had total control on me. I put all my effort to help him, that all energy which I before used for creating and to myself. It was always about him: he has his difficult past and he has his problems and he is this and he is that and I don't understand life from his point of view.

And as he corrupted my mind, I really started to feel like I don't understand anything and I'm the stupid one. And it's not true, I'm not stupid. I have experienced hard things in my life, but I have also succeed in life. And I have succeed because I am the person I am. But he was so strongly reflecting himself to me that I became him in his eyes. He though he can treat me like he treats himself. And it's kinda true, like I wrote: YOU are your worse enemy.

This is first time ever I experience something like this and it's fucking negative thing. You kind of loose yourself. But I'm very happy I lived this. I learnt. I definitely did. I looked myself in the mirror and understood that actually in my life everything is pretty good. I should be happy about myself, respect myself more. And without my new friends in this new city I would have gone very deep, but when I decided to go further in my life, from somewhere these people which I didn't even think as my close friends, came and took me from my hand and said: we're here for you.

So I have done something right too!

Now I'm starting to be inspired again, little by little. This is a new start and maybe this experience will also effect my further creations. Wow!

 “Thus another friendship was dashed on the cruel rocks amid the storm of my self-destruction.” ― Russell Brand

Happy New Year 2014!

My Facebook page

I'm very Finnish when it comes to promoting myself. This time I decided to collect courage and make a page for my visual arts, or me as an visual artist.

If you want to follow my thoughts about creating and creations, like my page on FB.

Many thanks :)

My final work for Metropolia University of Applied Sciences

"Die Seele in Berlin is handling inner loneliness and lack of reflection while being alone"

Hopefully this year I'll be BA of Arts. Have loots of work to be done, but at least I'm done with my final work!

HFUT is rising again!